What is the point of not trying?
Updated: Dec 6, 2020
I'll start this post off by thanking you, whomever you are, for indulging me in embarking on this new adventure. I can't wait to see where this goes, and I hope someone will find it interesting enough to journey on with me. A quick disclaimer, however, before we embark: I am not writer! My writing style tends to read as a stream of thought rather than concise sentences. Also, I love commas. You'll find them everywhere! Often times (I assume) in places that they ought not to be. So, brace yourself, and let's go!
I'm hoping this will become more than just a cathartic outlet during this COVID-19 funk. I'd like this forum to be both entertaining and educational. My vision for this blog is not to fill it with rants and personal nonsense (you are not my therapist nor am I vain enough to think that anyone will actually care to actually read these), but instead my vision is for thoughtful posts about art, design, inspiration, tips & tools, and motivation.
My goals with this blog selfishly do not lie in the sole attempt to provide you with interesting content and creative material. Ideally, by taking the time to plan, research, and write posts I will in turn grow my connection to art and design. I also hope this becomes a tool to keep myself motivated and constantly learning and DOING.
The beginning of any project has always been a struggle for me. I used to think it was because of a lack of motivation, but I think it's actually because of a lack of self-confidence. And not because I don't have the skills, but because I often believe that I don't have the talent. There is a difference between skill and talent, and that is that skills can be taught, while talent comes from some je ne sais quoi a person has. And I do not altogether believe that I have no talent. Sometimes I do see it in myself, like when a project seems to practically create itself, or when trying a new skill it comes to me almost effortlessly. I do know that it's there, it's just sometimes hard to believe in one's self!
And that lack of self-confidence brings with itself fear. Let me explain. Let's say that I wake up one morning with the creative juices flowing and decide that I'm in the mood to paint. How exciting! So, I pull out the canvas, set up my paints and brushes, find a stimulating location and settle in. Then I stare at that perfectly white, blank canvas. And fear overcomes me. I am halted and consumed with the fear that whatever I do on that canvas will not be good enough. My talent will not be good enough. I will not be good enough. And then I decide that, obviously, it's not the time to paint after all, and I put all of my equipment away and go back to bed. Well, maybe not back to bed, but I might as well do.
It's that fear of rejection, and not even being rejected by whomever might see my work. Rejected by myself! How backwards is that? When I look at my own work, all I tend to see are the imperfections, the mistakes, the bad parts. Any good parts are overshadowed by all of the bad parts, and I tell myself, what is the point of even trying?
Well, it's time for a new perspective! Now, instead of what is the point of even trying, I'm telling myself: what is the point of NOT trying? Seriously though! What IS the point of not trying? What is going to happen if I try and it's not perfect? I mean, how boring is perfection anyways?! That's not art, that's not beauty, and that's not the point of creating and doing and trying. To hell with perfection!
So, I have decided to start this new blog project with no fear! That's right folks, it's gone! I'm cured! ...Ok no, definitely not cured. However, I'm choosing to look past it. Putting it away, boxing it up. I'm allowing it to be there but trudging along anyways. Hell, it's not like anyone is actually going to read this anyways! So, what is the point of not trying?!